


Winchester Christmas Miracle

by WaywardAF67



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel and Dean Winchester Use Their Words, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Castiel/Dean Winchester, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker, No Angst, Season/Series 13 Spoilers, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, up to e06
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 17:18:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13058571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaywardAF67/pseuds/WaywardAF67
Summary: All is calm at the Men of Letters bunker. Cas and Jack are back home under the careful watch of the Winchesters. They find themselves with no apocalypse on the horizon and decide to take a break to celebrate Christmas. Although he has the perfect gift for Jack, Dean struggles to find a good enough present for Castiel. With a hint from Cas and a little help from Sam, Dean may be able to give the angel exactly what he wants.





	Winchester Christmas Miracle

**Author's Note:**

> Notes: Dean is emotionally OOC. But any love confession from Dean would be OOC so… go with it. He’s a secret sap, okay? There is enough in character, that I hope it's not too unbelievable. 
> 
> Also, Mary was still gone when I started this, I personally don't like her character on the show, so I didn't want to change the whole story to include her. 
> 
> Thank you to Ellen of Oz for helping me as always. I couldn't write without her. And thanks to my fan-fic-aholics for supporting me and encouraging me to finish this story when I wanted to drop out.

Dean stares at the TV, wondering how this is his life. A few months ago his best friend had been resurrected from the dead, and his half-angel adoptive son ran away in a fit of teenage angst. Now he’s grudgingly watching some stupid black and white movie about Angels, of all damn things; as if they didn’t get enough of those dicks with wings in their real lives. Now they bring them into the wonderful world of fiction?

He had strongly considered fratricide when Sam suggested they watch ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’. Jack was beaming and too excited for Dean to protest. He's slowly coming to realize after he accepted Jack as part of the family, that his puppy dog eyes out-rank Sam and Cas’. Mostly it's because Dean knows Jack isn't using his adorable sad face to manipulate him. It's a genuine emotion that flashes across Jack’s face when he begs Dean for something, or when his eyes sparkle at the thought of a real Christmas (also Sam’s idea). The more Dean thinks about it, murdering his brother doesn’t seem like such a bad idea, but then he remembers how Cas would have to try and heal him, and his powers are shoddy at best right now. Jack hasn’t mastered the art of healing yet, and with Asmodeus gone, there would hardly be anyone he could make a deal with to bring Sam back. No, murdering his younger sibling isn’t a good idea at all, but it sure is fun to daydream about, especially when there is nothing but garbage on the television.

Dean takes a moment to reflect on how it came to be that they had a free moment to celebrate Christmas. Months ago, Asmo-douch-eus captured Cas and held him for ransom. One Angel in exchange for one Nephil. Dean never even considered it, but Jack insisted they make the trade. He refused, and Sam backed him up. But, like a true teenager, Jack ignored them, going after Cas himself. He burst through the door, causing Asmodeus to jump from his seat. According to Cas, Jack had insisted he release his father. When Evil Colonel Sanders refused to release Lucifer, Jack actually laughed in his face. His eyes glowed a bright golden yellow, and Castiel’s cell popped open. With the reflexes of a tiny, adorable gap-toothed kitten, Jack quickly flicked his wrist and Asmodeus was locked in the cell with Lucifer. It took them several hours, but Cas and Jack walked out of Crowley’s old throne room, having locked Dumb and Dumber in the Cage. Not the old damaged cage, no, the two nerds had spent hours constructing something new and much more powerful. Dean actually feels bad that Sam wasn’t there to help. If it were up to him, he would have just killed them both, but Cas wouldn’t risk Jack’s emotional state.

“Father, is that really how angels get their wings? I don’t remember a specific bell ringing the first time I flew away.” Jack turns from his seat on the floor, looking up at Castiel.

“No Jack, this movie is highly inaccurate in its angel facts.”

Dean laughs, and Sam shushes everyone, burying his face in the throw pillow he’s clutching to his chest. Yes, the Winchesters now have throw pillows. Once Cas returned home with Jack by his side, he turned into June Cleaver. He decided the bunker needed an overhaul and went Bed, Bath, and Beyond crazy. Not that Dean complained, he liked the new substantial sectional and 60-inch TV. Sam was also happy with Cas’ newfound domesticity. Having a family room meant Dean wasn’t eating while watching Netflix on his bed. Everyone enjoyed the floor mats in the bathroom, and if Dean was honest, which of course he wasn’t, he really liked the matching shower curtains and soap dispensers. To hear Cas tell it, they were a family, and it was about time they started living like one. Just because they kill monsters doesn’t mean they don’t deserve nice things.

So here he is, his overgrown baby brother misty-eyed, his angel grumbling about inconsistencies, and his, well, whatever Jack was to him, staring at the screen in wonder. For once he decides to drop the grumpy act and just enjoy the moment. He and Sam are going to pick a tree tomorrow, and he’s sure there will be plenty to be pissed off about then.

He thinks about what he wants to get his family for Christmas. He’s never had a real present exchange with Sam before, and wants to make it special. The last time they celebrated Christmas he got his brother shaving cream and skin mags. He’s sure anything he buys this year will top that. Over the previous months, they have gotten Jack everything he needs, and the kid doesn’t express any desire for material things. As long as he’s got a good movie on his new laptop, he’s happy. However, Dean thinks he has a pretty good idea of what to give Jack. Cas, on the other hand, is a little more complicated. Things have been… different, since his return. Having the guy back for two days before thinking he was gone again really put things in perspective. That’s not wholly accurate since Dean doesn’t know what’s going on between them. He just knows that separating from Cas again isn’t going to be an option for a very long time. He hardly lets the angel out of his sight as of late. Sam’s even made several lame jokes about Cas being grateful he didn’t have to use the restroom, comparing Dean to a cat waiting outside the door. He didn’t even bother getting huffy at Sam’s attempt at comedy, he mostly agreed.

The thing is, it’s been great spending so much time with Cas. They have gone on a few milk runs and spent time working with Jack. What started out as a rocky relationship with the kid, has turned into a blooming one. He doesn’t know why Jack so often seeks his approval, but Dean makes sure to go out of his way to validate him. Cas always offers him a soft smile each time he compliments Jack.

In Cas’ attempt to become a Stepford Wife, he insists Dean teach both him and Jack to cook. Jack doesn’t need to eat, but he also doesn’t taste molecules, making food enjoyable. Sam takes them running, while Dean stays behind to prepare breakfast. It’s the happiest he’s ever been.

As he gets ready for bed, Dean thinks the only thing that would make this perfect would be having Mary there. He’s almost positive she’s dead, but there is still a small part of him that wants to believe Lucifer when he said she was alive when he left.

There is a soft knock on his door, and he yells for Cas to come in.

“How do you always know it’s me?” the angel asks.

“Because you’re the only one in this bunker who doesn’t knock like they are the damn police. What’s up, Cas? You okay?”

Cas sighs and looks down at his shoes. “I just spoke to Jody. She’s not sure she is going to make it for the holidays.”

Dean blinks in confusion. “I didn’t know we invited Jody. But that blows that she can’t make it.” 

“Oh, I figured Sam must have told you. He called her last week and told her we were hosting Christmas this year, and their attendance was required.” 

“Nope, not a peep. They working a case or something?”

“It seems Jody will be spending time with Patience Turner.” 

Dean gives a half smile. “Jody’s home for wayward girls. Maybe we should get her a sign made for Christmas.”

“I’m sorry, Dean. I know you didn’t want Patience in this life, but it seems she has made her choice.”

“Yeah well, at least she will be with Jody. That’s the safest place for her right now. Maybe they can pop in for the New Year. We’ll put your cooking skills to the test.”

“I’ll let you get some rest now.  Goodnight, Dean.”

“Night, Cas.”

As Cas was halfway out the door, Dean called out to him, “Hey Cas? Look, I -- I um, I don’t know what to get you for Christmas. You won’t say what want, and I can’t come up with anything special enough.”

Cas’ features soften as he walks back into Dean’s room, tilting his head to the side. “I have one true Christmas wish, Dean, but I’m not sure I’ll receive that gift this year.”

“But how can you get it, if you won’t tell anyone what it is?”

The angel chuckles. “Everyone knows what it is, Dean. Everyone but you.” He throws Dean what was supposed to be a wink, but in actuality was just a rapid blink, and walks across the hall to his room. He shuts the door snickering to himself. Dumb adorable angel.

 

\----------------------------------------------

 

Dean’s still grumbling about leaving his precious baby at the U-Haul as they walk through the lot filled with Christmas Trees. “What did you think we were going to do, Dean, teleport it home?” Sam chides. And dammit, now Dean’s wishing he would have brought Jack to pick the Christmas Tree. It would have been better than leaving his car in a strange parking lot in the middle of nowhere 

Dean huffs and stomps off in search of the best tree. He already knows what he wants, and Sam isn’t going to stop him. He spots the perfect Douglas Fir off in the corner and makes a beeline for it. It’s thick and lush, with hardly any bald spots. And best of all, it smells amazing. He turns with a bright grin, calling Sam away from the stupid sappy pine tree.

Sam looked as though he was going to argue, but Dean cut him off with excited chatter. “Look at her, Sammy. Isn’t she perfect? She’s going to make the whole family room smell like Christmas. 

Giving Dean a curious look, Sam says, “Well look who’s finally in the Christmas spirit. I was looking for a pine tree, but you’re right, Dean this is going to look good next to the TV.”

Dean feels like Sam is more than compromising, letting him pick the tree. “Nah man, we can look at the pines. They have some that smell good too. I think they have fluffy ones right? I mean, spread out branches do make sense if you want a lot of ornaments and--”

“Dean, stop. This is our tree. Wait here; I’ll go get the guy.” Before he can protest, Sam is gone. Dean only has a moment to feel embarrassed about his babbling before Sam returns with a receipt and a Christmas Tree stand.

No one ever told Dean how awkward it is getting a tree into a truck. The tree is taller than Sam, and while it isn’t exactly heavy, it’s hard to maneuver. After several minutes of struggling, and excessive cursing, they finally get the tree loaded in the truck. Dean expresses his worry about the branches getting flattened, and Sam just laughs and climbs in the driver's seat.  

Dean settles in for the hour-long drive back to the bunker, contemplating how to broach the subject of Jack’s Christmas gift. Nervously Dean begins, “Hey Sam, can I ask you something?”

“Dean, I’ve told you a hundred times, I am not telling you what happens in A Dance with Dragons. You’re just going to have to read it on your own if you want to know what happens next.”

“I’m not going to read the book when the author might actually DIE before the next book comes out. I’m not a masochist. Dammit, Sam, that’s not even what I was talking about.”

“Oh, sorry. What’s up?”

Dean plucks at a stray thread on his jeans. “Don’t make it a big deal or anything, but I wanted to give Jack something of mine for Christmas. But I, um, kind of want you to be okay with it before I give it away.”

Sam’s face turns serious. “What is it you want to give him?”

“Okay, just hear me out before you make a decision, alright? And be honest with me. If you’re not cool with it, I won’t do it. But uh-- I kind of wanted to give him the amulet - the one you gave me when we were kids. Look, that necklace was never meant for me. Bobby gave it to you to give to Dad, but you decided you wanted to give it to me. That always meant something to me. It was probably nothing but your little kid guilt, but it always felt to me like in that moment you choose me over Dad. That you finally saw I was the one who took care of you. Then Cas took it to find God because he chose free will. I know it sounds stupid, but it’s always been a symbol of choice to me. We make our own destiny and all that bullshit. So I kind of wanted to give it to Jack so that he knows the choice is his. He can be good if he wants to be.”

By the time Dean finishes his speech, he’s bright red. He feels like this is the most honest he’s been with Sam in a very long time.

“You don’t need my permission, Dean, but I think it’s a great idea. Like a family heirloom, you’re passing down. I think he’ll love it.”

“You think?”

“Yeah, I really do.”

They ride in silence for several more miles. Dean can tell there's a question hanging in the air, and promises himself he will be honest if Sam asks. He might as well make a day out of sharing and caring. This conversation was coming sooner or later, might as well get it over with. But he isn't going to push the issue. Sam will ask when he asks.  

As if he suddenly became a fortune teller, Dean hears Sam draw in a breath and braces himself for THE question. “So, do you know what you are getting Cas?”

“Uh -- no.”

“You don’t even have any ideas?”

“Well, I might have a slight idea. But uh, fuck, man I don’t know. He said I should know what he wants. Well, actually he said everyone else knows what he wants except me. But I know. He knows I know.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“The problem is, how the fuck can I give him what he wants?”

“You just do. I mean if you don’t want to give him, uh, that, then don’t. But if you actually want to, then just do it. Don’t over complicate things.”

“Now you sound like him. But it’s not that easy, Sam, it’s never that easy, not with us. I mean what if --”

Sam interrupts Dean before he can start listing off excuses. “What if nothing, Dean. I know you. You have three excuses lined up, right? You probably think, for some stupid reason, that you don’t deserve to be happy. You do, you saved the world more times than I can count. You, more than anyone, deserves to be happy.”

“No, I don’t.”

“I wasn’t finished. Let’s see, excuse number two,” Sam holds up two fingers close to Dean's face. “I’m guessing you think he deserves someone better than you, right?”

Dean keeps his eyes trained on his boots. This conversation is so much worse than he expected.

“Right. But come on man, you know that’s not true. The guy has given up everything for you. The most recent example: he clawed his way back from the Empty for you, Dean. Cas will always choose you. Not to mention, it’s not your choice to make. If Cas thinks you’re good enough, which you are by the way, then how can you argue against that?”

“He didn’t come back for me; he came home for Jack.”

“Yet you were the first person he called.”

Dean never let himself think about his status with Cas. Since his return, they had been working with Jack, teaching him both how to be human and angel. They made a great team, not only with Jack but in everything they did. But he never believed it was more than just how well they knew each other. The words ‘profound bond’ floated around his mind from time to time, but that didn’t mean anything more than just a really close friendship, right? Now that he’s actually faced with the real possibility, he’s starting to see where the things they did were maybe more than things ‘just friends’ would do. The nights Dean didn’t object to Cas watching over him while he slept, the lack of personal space, the bickering alone should have clued him in. But it never seemed like the right time. They bounce from one disaster to another; there's never any time. Cas is gone more often than he's around and dies as frequently as he and Sam do. How can you love someone who dies so often?

“And here’s my favorite, Dean. Your big guns, so to speak. How could you stand to lose Cas if you went down that road? But really Dean, how much different would it be than losing him now? You two as practically a couple as it is. Raising a kid together, cooking, snuggling on the couch. Don’t huff at me; you share a blanket sitting right next to each other. That’s cuddling. Look, there is no answer for this one, Dean. If you lose him again, it will be bad. Probably worse than anything you’ve ever experienced. But are you going to let that fear keep you from having everything you’ve ever dreamed of? This is your shot to have a family. Don’t throw it away.”

“OKAY-- that’s enough. I draw the line at Hamilton quotes.”

“What?”

“Huh?”

“How do you know Hamilton quotes, Dean?”

“Shuddup, Cas likes to listen to it when we cook.”

Sam laughs, lightening the moment. “Oh my gawd, you guys are so married. Seriously, though, it’s worth the risk.”

“I hate you,” Dean says, but there’s no fire behind his words.

“No you don’t, you love me. Just like you love Cas.”

“Alright, Sasquatch, you had your fun. Don’t expect me to open up to you for at least another year. I am maxed out on chick flick moments.”

Sam chuckles but thankfully drops the subject. The rest of the ride back to the bunker is spent laughing and teasing - something Dean has really missed sharing with his brother. Everything is always so serious now that he sometimes forgets how much he enjoys Sam’s company.

Back at the bunker, with just as much effort as it took to get the tree in the truck, they get it out and set up in the family room. There may be more cursing and name calling, but the tree is up, and everyone is mostly satisfied.

“It’s beautiful!” Jack exclaims.

“You ain’t seen nothing yet, kid. Wait until we get the decorations on her,” Dean smirks.

“Alright Clark Griswold, calm down,” Sam adds.

Dean notices Cas’ puzzled expression and explains ‘National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation’, claiming they are watching it later that night. He’s starting to get excited, and that scares him. He’s sure the other shoe is going to drop any minute now.

“So why don’t we all head to Wal-Mart and pick some decorations? We can grab some snacks and have a tree trimming party. That’s what normal families do, right?” Sam suggests.

“Sounds good. You guys will have to take a different car though. We can’t all fit in the stupid truck --”

Jack interrupts Dean, “That’s okay, I’ll fly.” Before Dean can protest, Jack flaps out of the bunker.

Pointing a finger at Cas, Dean says, “This is your fault. He better not have just shown up in the middle of the decoration aisles.”

Cas just rolls his eyes and heads toward the rented truck.  

The three men pile into the small truck cab. Sam rented the truck under his ‘normal life’ alias and refused to let Dean drive, claiming he’s the one responsible for the truck, so Dean sits on the passenger side of the truck petulantly, Cas smashed into his left side. He’s fidgeting, and Cas is clearly agitated. They have been fighting for arm dominance since they got in the truck. It’s only been ten minutes since they left the bunker and Dean feels like he’s suffocating. Every time Cas settles his arm on top of Dean’s, he pulls back and leans further into the door, but eventually slowly migrates back towards Cas, somehow how trapping his arm behind Cas’.

“Will you stop fidgeting?”

“Will you scoot over?”

“I can’t scoot over. I think Sam’s comfort is slightly more important than your own. I don’t want to cause him any distraction.”

“Sam’s a better driver than all these idiots when he’s half dead. I think you can share the love.”

Cas turns to look at him, which is way too close in such a tiny space. If he turned his head to face the angel, their noses would bump. So he gives him his best side-eye.

“Would this make you more comfortable if I said ‘no homo’?”

“What? No. Come on, Cas. Don’t be a dick. I just don’t like feeling trapped. Your arm resting on mine is driving me nuts.”

Cas looks at his own arm like it’s offended him, then looks up at Dean. Shrugging, Cas slips his arm around the back of the bench seat. “There, is that better?”

Dean feels his face begin to heat. “Uh, yeah. Thanks.”

Dean finally settles down and begins to relax. He thinks about what Sam said: _You just do it_ . Thinks maybe he can. Maybe he can just slowly progress things forward, and they would never have to talk about it. If he didn’t have to have _the talk_ with Cas, it might make it a little easier. He’s sure Cas could understand that. In fact, he knows Cas would understand that. No one knows how allergic he is to feelings more than his angel. He counts this as an experiment, and having Cas sitting next to him, hip to hip, hasn’t been bad. It’s actually been nice. He shuffles slightly, pushing his shoulder into Cas’ armpit. He keeps his eyes trained forward, but watches Cas out of his periphery. His friend's mouth slightly ticks up at the corner, and that floods Dean with relief. Yup, he’s just going to do it.  

 

\-----------------------------------------------------

 

They drop off the rental truck and make their way to Wal-Mart. Jack is standing out front, grinning and offering good tidings to anyone who walks by. They join him at the entrance and make their way towards the back where all the decorations are stored.

They all decided that if they were going to have their first real Christmas tree they were going to make it as big and tacky as possible. They added red and gold bulbs to the cart, also throwing in random individual ornaments. Dean found one of a guitar that he had to have, and Cas picked a moose and squirrel to add to their bounty. As much as they all didn’t want to admit it, they missed Crowley, and the set was a nice memorial.  Dean let out a raucous laugh when he saw Sam with an arm full of ornaments. He even had one of those creepy mini nutcrackers. Sam met Dean’s eyes, challenging him to say something. Even though Dean had a least three jokes queued up about the size of Sam’s nutcracker, he held his tongue. There was a stone-cold determination in Sam’s features that were normally reserved for monsters, and for Dean, that one time he added the Nair to his shampoo. But he learned his lesson that time. The shorter Winchester ducked his head and walked back to Cas, staring at the angels in 'drag'. He walked up to his friend mumbling under his breath, “I still don’t understand why humans believe angels wear dresses. It’s highly impractical.”

Dean stood in the middle of the most awful big-box store surrounded by his family - Sam squirreling away his ornaments, so they didn’t get mixed in with anyone else's, Cas staring daggers into the innocent angel ornament, and Jack wrapping himself in tinsel. If it weren't for the very real ache in his back from moving the tree, he would think he was stuck in some dream where the Djinn got off on the taste of holiday cheer. It's probably been one of the best days of his life, and it's only getting better.

“I’m going to go hunt down Christmas Vacation and grab some eggnog. Cas, you wanna grab some whiskey? And don’t get the cheap shit. We’re celebrating, after all.”

One maxed-out credit card, a trunk full of holiday joy, and two steaming hot pizzas later, they are on their way home. Dean has finally figured out what to give Cas and stuffs it under the driver’s seat while everyone loads the trunk. They aren’t exchanging gifts for another few days, and Dean is sure he’s already got hypertension.

Everyone else seems excited to get the tree decorated, so they decide to just eat in shifts. Sam is stringing the lights while Cas carefully separates the ornaments. He seems to be taking a tactical approach. Dean suspects that after everyone is asleep, Cas is going to come in and rearrange the tree, placing every ornament just so. He smiles to himself imagining Cas dressed as The Grinch, but instead of stealing Christmas, he will be making it more visually pleasing.

“Awwwww, Cas, look. Dean is enjoying himself. Look at the smile,” Sam coos. 

“Shuddup!” Dean lamely retorts. Though he tries, he’s unable to wipe the smile off his face. At that moment he decides that he’s going to stop with the macho bravado, for real this time, at least until Christmas. There is nothing wrong with loving this; hell, most people do.

He’s always been a bit jealous that Sam doesn’t feel the need to prove his masculinity. Sam is the most badass hunter Dean knows. He’ll be the first to admit that his brother is better than he is. Yet, he’s so soft and open. He never runs from his feelings and even has healthy coping skills, something Dean knows he does not possess. Looking at the other three men in the room he realizes that he’s the only one scared of his emotions. Jack has been alive for seven months and still communicates better than he does.

Letting go of his tough guy act gives him big ideas for Cas' present. Sure, Sam is going to make fun of him, but he will secretly be thrilled. Jack will probably not understand what a big deal it is, so he doesn’t have that to worry about. Dean momentarily contemplates falling on an angel blade before letting the next thought creep through. He’s actually going to give Cas that stupid mistletoe he bought, but not in private like he originally planned. No, he’s going to have Cas open the gift right there in front of everyone, showing Cas he wants this and proving he doesn’t have to always hide from his feelings.

The rest of the night passes in a blur. They finish the tree and stuff themselves on pizza and eggnog. The four of them curl up on the couch, Dean and Cas sharing a blanket, and sitting closer than necessary.  They watch ‘Christmas Vacation’, laughing until they cry when Clark flies down the hill on his lubed up saucer sled. Before long everyone is tucked away in their own rooms.

 

\-----------------------------------------------------

 

The next day, Dean is up before everyone to start making pancakes. He’s not sure where Jack and Cas are; they usually spend the evenings meditating as a form of rest. Every few days Jack will sleep, but that’s more out of boredom than necessity.

The smell of bacon draws his brother to the kitchen, and Sam plops down at the kitchen table. “I think I’m getting too old for spiked eggnog.”

Dean slides a fresh cup of coffee in front of Sam and ruffles his hair. “Awwww, does little Sammy have a hangover?”

“Shut up, dick, not all of us are professional binge drinkers.”

“It’s not a skill for the weak. Lucky for you, you have an awesome older brother who knows the fastest way to cure a hangover: greasy breakfast and electrolytes.” Next to Sam’s coffee, he sets down a plate full of bacon, pancakes, and two fried eggs along with a red Gatorade. “Before you complain, there’s fruit in the fridge, but that might be a little harsh on your stomach right now.”

Sam gazes up at him in wonder. “How did you even know I would be hungover? And how are you not hungover? You drank twice as much as I did.”

Dean points at himself with the piece of bacon he's about to eat. “Professional, remember? Plus, you’ve always overdone it on the eggnog. We may not do Christmas every year, but we have our traditions, and you catching a hangover from eggnog happens every year.”

“Thanks, man. This was really nice.”

“Don’t get used to it. It’s just for the stupid holidays.”

“You know, it’s okay to be nice. You don’t have to be a badass hunter all the time,” Sam says around a mouth full of food. 

“Hey, apparently I have a reputation I have to uphold.”

Sam huffs, “It’s still so weird to think people talk about us like we are legends or something.”

“It’s because we are, Sammy.”

They finish their breakfast in comfortable silence. As soon as they finish eating, Sam jumps up and offers to wash the dishes.

“I’m preparing the menu for Christmas dinner. All the usual suspects will be there, turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes. But is there, uh, anything special you want me to fix? I’m sure Cas and Jack will want to help with something. Maybe we can put them to work to make a nice meal for Christmas eve?”

“I don’t know. Think Cas would want to make his spaghetti sauce? I know it has to simmer all day or whatever.”

 Dean smiles, “I’ll ask him. I think he’ll be up for it. It’s not like it’s hard. And it’s not his sauce, it’s mine.”

“I don’t know, man. Don’t hit me, but I like his better. Maybe it’s the special ingredient.”

“If you say he adds love to his cooking, I will shoot you.” Sam bursts out laughing, and Dean joins in. It’s nice sharing these moments with his brother.

They are still laughing when Jack enters the room and asks Sam if he will take him to some old-timey theater to watch another black and white Christmas movie. “Of course, you are welcome to come as well, Dean. But given your reception of It’s a Wonderful Life, I didn’t think you’d be interested.”

“You’re not wrong. You guys go and enjoy the lack of color and CGI. I’ll get a pot roast going and bribe Cas into hanging out with me.”

“You don’t have to bribe me to hang out, you know I enjoy our time together,” Cas says, standing directly behind Dean, causing the other man to startle and whirl around. “Jesus, Cas. You can’t just sneak up on me like that. I swear I’m getting you--”

“A bell,” the other three add in unison.

Dean glares at the rest of his family. “You all think you’re so damn funny. I’m making a supply run in half an hour. Add anything you want - list’s on the table.” He turns to face Cas. “Sam wants you to make your spaghetti. You cool with that?”

“Of course.”

“Awesome.” Dean turns to exit the kitchen but hesitates before turning back to Cas once again, “Oh and um, think of something Christmasy you want to do while Sam and Jack are out.” With that, Dean rushes off before anyone can see the blush creeping up his neck.

Later that afternoon, Dean is putting the lid back on his crockpot when Cas approaches him with a timid smile. “I know what I would like to do tonight, Dean.”

“Yeah? Alright, what’s the plan?”

Castiel hands Dean a small gift bag. “I would like to drive around and look at Christmas lights. I made this for you as a compromise. It’s Christmas music but performed by Classic Rock artists. I thought it would be more tolerable that way.”

He eyes the small present in his hand, slowly pulling the tape out. This was apparently a thing they did now: exchange mixtapes. “Thanks, man. Let me change, and we can head out. We’ll hit up the coffee shop and get you your white chocolate peppermint thing.”

He can't help but smile, seeing Cas light up. They had gone for the stupid peppermint thing a few times, so he’s not sure why that made his friend so happy, but if Cas is happy, he’s happy. And oh gawd, what a sap he is. Thinking about really doing this thing, this relationship has really turned him soft.

They leave the bunker just before dusk. Dean didn’t plan that, but the warm glow of the setting sun did make the drive that much more enjoyable. It's been one of those sunny days that makes you think it’s going to be on the warm side, but is deceiving. The sun shone, but it was still below freezing. It’s the perfect driving weather. There’s snow in the forecast for the following day, so he makes a mental note to call Sam on their way home to see if they need any last minute items from the store. If things go ideally, they will be safe and warm in the bunker, enjoying time with family, not having to leave to buy forgotten items. During the earlier shopping trip, he picked up everything he needed to make a Christmas Day feast, plus the Christmas Eve spaghetti. He just hopes they get to eat the leftovers before they get called out on a case. 

After leaving the coffee shop, Dean makes his way to the wealthy part of town in Smith Center. He figures the houses in the nice neighborhoods would have the best displays. The drive isn’t very long, and they spend most of it chatting. Cas explains the pagan traditions that have made their way into the current celebration of the holiday, and Dean opens up about his past Christmases.

They make their way through several neighborhoods before they decide to head back home. Dean's surprised he enjoyed the outing as much as he did. It’s very rare for him and Cas to have time just to enjoy each other’s company. There is usually hardly ever any time for small talk or reminiscing, but that’s exactly what they do for the next few hours. He even lets Cas coax him into singing along when he knows the words. And he will take it to his grave that he sang most of the male parts for ‘Baby, It’s Cold Outside’. It’s not like he even has to sing, just talk along really, and Cas gives him the big stupid puppy dog eyes. It isn’t fair as if dealing with his brother’s tiny dog face isn’t enough, now he has Cas playing the same game. He would be mad or embarrassed, but the first time Cas’ voice broke, and he continued to shriek the lyrics to Bob Seger's rendition of ‘The Little Drummer Boy’, he laughed until he snorted. After that, all bets are off. Cas continues to sing horribly, and he joins along when he isn't laughing. He now has a new perspective of “voice of an angel.” All in all, he’s enjoying the music Cas picked for them.

“Styx, REO Speedwagon, Seger, Bon Jovi Cas where the hell did you find all this music.”

“It’s not hidden, Dean. I just looked up some songs. If you weren’t so anti-Christmas, you would have known about them.”

“I’m not anti-Christmas. We just never have time for it. If we take time off for holidays, other people lose their lives. I think sacrificing a few presents and some mistletoe is a decent trade-off.” Dean tenses up. He hopes Cas doesn’t notice how red he’s turned after mentioning mistletoe. Not that Cas will know what it means, but he doesn’t want to deal with Cas questioning his sudden embarrassment.

“You’re right. If there is a case, of course you don’t stop to celebrate. But Dean, last year you dragged Sam across the country for what turned out to be an actual wild animal attack.”

“Alright, smartass, maybe I have avoided Christmas in the past. But there usually isn’t much to celebrate in our lives, you know.”

Cas shifts in his seat, turning to face Dean, “But you feel you have something to celebrate this year?”

“Yeah, I mean you’re back, the kid’s okay, evil and eviler aren’t a problem, and no wild beasts are masking as werewolves.” Dean turns to give his friend a genuine smile.

“You think me being back is cause for celebration?”

“Come on, man, you know it is. I was messed up when you were gone, Cas.”

“But why?”

Dean’s smile slowly slips into a frown. “What kind of stupid question is that? Why wouldn’t I be fucked up after watching you-- after you were gone?”

“I just didn’t realize my death would have that much of an impact on you.”

The tape ended long ago, leaving the sounds of the road the only noise to be heard. Dean takes a deep breath before he spits out his confession. He already decided he had to share his feelings with Cas, and it was going to be much easier in the privacy of his car, instead of baring his soul in front of Sam and Jack. If he plays his cards right, he can still go through with the god-awful present idea. He’s actually grateful for this opportunity, and that gives him the courage to begin. It’s not a long speech, but it’s well rehearsed.

“I still don’t understand why you can’t see how much you mean to us. To me. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had. No one has been more loyal to me in my life. Even though all the lies and betrayals, it’s always been with the best of intentions. I trust you Cas, not only with my life but with Sam’s. You gotta know what that means to me. Tell me what I have to do to convince you that I need you?”

Dean’s heart is racing. That didn’t come out as he planned at all. It still felt too much like the same old “you're my brother” speech. He sees a dirt road turnoff and decides to pull off.

“I-- I don’t know. I just mess up and cause you more pain and struggle. I don’t know why you would care for me.”

He slows to a stop and cuts off the lights, turning to face Cas. _Don’t over complicate things._ He replays his conversation with Sam. _You just do it_ , he reminds himself.

“I broke the first seal that started the apocalypse. The thing that led to your fall, your eviction from Heaven, and ultimately your death. I fuck up too, Cas. But here we are, together, fighting the good fight and all that shit.” Dean tries to be subtle as he scoots closer to Cas. Now that his mind is made up, he has to get this out.

His knee knocks against Cas’. “I don’t tell you enough. I just hope that you understand my yelling, and for the most part, you do. But I guess you need to hear it, too. I want you around Cas. I hate when you’re not there. I go to bed every night wondering when or if I will see you again. I yell at you when you don’t answer or call back quickly because of all the reasons you’ve had for not answering or calling back. I know it’s not the answer you were looking for. Maybe you were hoping I would say it’s because you’re loyal, funny in your own way, cute, badass, and have my back more than anyone other than Sam ever has.” Dean reaches out and places his hand on Cas’ shoulder, sliding it up around his neck. “I was fucked up when you were gone because I want you. I want you here with me. Where we can keep each other safe. 

Dean’s hand tightens around Cas’ neck as he pulls the angel forward. Cas is rigid and hasn’t responded to him. They are just inches apart, and as much as Dean wants to dive right in and taste Cas, he displays the most astonishing amount of self-restraint. If he’s going to star in a chick flick, he’s at least going to do it right. First kiss on Christmas and everything. So instead of planting his lips on Castiel’s, he reaches up and places a sweet kiss on his forehead, and promptly ruins the moment by chuckling at Cas’ gasp.

Cas pulls back and gives him his patented squinty scowl, but doesn’t say anything. Dean backs up slightly and waves his hand in front of himself. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to laugh. You just gasped so dramatically.” Dean took in a lungful of air, mimicking Cas’ shocked gasp. “It was cute.”

“Now is not the time to mock me, Dean. I am thoroughly confused, you kissed me and called me cute.”

“Of all the shit I just said, cute was the one word you clung to?”

Cas shrugged, “Of course. It’s the only thing that distinguishes this from every other ‘you are my brother’ conversation we’ve had. Hence the confusion.”

“Yeah, okay. You’re right. Look, I’m working towards a goal here, alright? It’s just going to take me a little time to get there. Just a few days, okay?”

Cas beams at Dean. That adorable smile that he’s always loved. The one where his eyes get all squinty, his nose crinkles, and his gums show. He’s only seen this look on his angel a few times, so he cherishes it while he can. Cas nods his head in approval.

“Good.” Dean scoots back over to the driver’s seat and starts the car. “Let get home. I’m starving.”

Dean is worried he broke Cas. He doesn’t say anything on the ride home, and that’s unusual. “Hey man, you okay? Did I cross the line back there?”  

“What? No! Not at all. I’m sorry, I guess I was just lost in thought. I apologize, I didn’t mean to worry you.”

“Yeah, okay. Good. Awesome.”

“Are you okay?”

“Peachy.”

“Dean, you don’t have to--”

“Cas, I’m good. Really.”

Cas still doesn't say anything, just smiles, and nods. If you asked him two hours ago, Dean would have said his plan was going to be perfect. Now, he’s not so sure. Cas seemed receptive earlier, but now he’s pulling back, and that’s scaring the hell out of him. What if he assumed wrong? What if he misunderstood what Cas wanted. 

As if Cas read his mind (which he didn't because it turns out, he can't), he lays a calming hand on Dean’s shoulder. It's the wrong shoulder, but it's soothing all the same. He keeps his hand there the rest of the drive home, and that's enough to boost Dean's confidence back up.  

Sam and Jack are already home by the time they get back to the bunker. They are in the living room, where they spent most of their time the past week, and it’s nice to see them there.  He thinks that it might be time they stop running across the country at the drop of a hat. Maybe they can build up a network of hunters that work regionally. It’s a pipe dream, but something worth working towards.

They spend the rest of the evening eating pot roast in front of the TV. Jack asked to watch ‘Home Alone’ and questioned every injury the robbers acquired. It led to an interesting conversation with Sam and Dean explaining injuries they both received that should have put them in the hospital. Sam talks about how horrific it really is to step on a nail and Dean makes everyone laugh when he says he’s never gotten a paint bucket to the face, but had a witness spill paint all over his shoes. His brand new shoes. It’s a dark topic, but it’s rare they get to laugh about what they do. Sam threatens Dean within an inch of his life if he ever considers burning his hair off. Dean looks scandalized, he would never use his flamethrower to ruin Sam’s hair. He would go a more subtle route, as he did with the Nair. Which then leads to all their prank war stories. Cas and Jack often laugh about Sam’s shortcomings when it comes to pranks, and Dean’s inability to give a decent comeback any time Sam makes a quip.

By one a.m. everyone has sore stomachs and raspy voices from laughing all night long. They part ways, exhaustion sinking in. It feels like preparing for Christmas is more tiring than hunting rugarus.

Christmas Eve morning comes, and Dean finds himself not wanting to leave his bed. He hasn’t checked outside yet but based on the chill in the room he assumes it has already started to snow. He wants a cup of coffee but debates the merit if his bare feet have to touch the floor. He mentally kicks himself for not taking his slippers off by the bed. He’s almost convinced himself to get up when he hears a light knock on the door. “C’mon in, Cas.”

Shutting the door behind him, Cas makes his way to Dean’s bed with a steaming cup of coffee. “Dude, you’re a lifesaver.”

“That’s true in the most literal form, but I doubt coffee is going to save your life.”

“Well at the very least then, you are a cold feet saver,” Dean nods to his slippers across the room.

Cas gets up to fetch the slippers. “It seems I’ve saved you from cold feet twice in one day.”

Dean bats his eyelashes dramatically. “My hero,” he croons. He takes a sip of his coffee. “What is this?”

“It’s a Christmas blend. I know your secret love of flavored coffee, so I made a pot this morning.”

“I don’t secretly love flavored coffee, it’s just not something I broadcast. But this is really good, Cas. Thanks.” Dean smiles over the rim of his mug.

Cas sits on the edge of Dean’s bed near his feet. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t it be okay?”

“I just, um, didn’t know if, uh, if you needed space while you ‘work on something’.”

Dean almost spits his drink all over the place. Cas watches him with owlish blue eyes, and he looks like a kid caught in the candy jar. He keeps repeating the word mentally, but Cas is just so damn cute. He wants to break his Christmas vow, and pull Cas down on the bed and siphon off all his body heat while he covers his face with kisses. Because he can decapitate a vamp, exorcise a demon, and drive with a broken arm, but damn it, he likes to cuddle. He’s tried to deny that about himself about as long as he has denied this thing with Cas. Might as well get over one to get under the other. Dean internally groans at his awful double entendre, and then mildly panics because as much as he’s imagined all the good things that can happen between him and Cas, he’s never thought of penetration. And just thinking the word has him squirming.

“Dean?”

“Ah, yeah. No, it’s okay. I don’t need space or anything. It’s fine. We’re fine. Everything is fine.”  He tries to give a half-hearted smile, but just the left side of his mouth turns up, and he’s worried he looks like a lunatic staring at Cas.

“Okay, I’ll leave you to drink your coffee in peace.”

“No!” Dean shouts. And Cas startles at his sudden increase in volume.

“No, I just mean I’ll come with you. I mean, I’m going to the kitchen. I don’t know if that’s where you are going. But that’s where I’m going. The kitchen. To make breakfast.” 

“I was simply trying to offer you some privacy to get dressed.”

For the first time, Dean realized that he’s only wearing boxers. Skin-tight boxer briefs, the kind that leaves nothing to the imagination. He pulls the blanket up to his chin. “Yeah, um, thanks.”

The second Cas closes the door, Dean sets his coffee down and flops back on his bed, rolling his eyes at himself. He’s just happy his comforter hadn’t slid down past his waist. Nipples out are still embarrassing, but way better than Cas learning what his dick looks like long before he’s ready. Now he’s panicking again, thinking about Cas and his dick at the same time.

When he walks into the kitchen, Cas is surrounded by a pile of fresh tomatoes. He looks like a mad scientist with tomatoes, pots, strainers, and knives everywhere. Dean chuckles at his friend as he heads to the coffee pot. It’s impossible for Cas to enjoy the flavor of his coveted spaghetti sauce, but his ability to taste every molecule has made it easier to get the proportions of each spice exactly perfect.

“I don’t know why you’re laughing. One of these knives is for you.”

“Has everyone in the bunker forgotten that I’m the one who taught you how to make the sauce?”

Cas responds by handing Dean a knife. “Sit. Peel.”

He does another eye roll that encompasses his whole body and sits next to the angel. “Fine, I’ll help, but I have to make breakfast at some point.”

“Thank you for your help., this will go much faster with both of us.”

They spend the next half hour peeling the skins from the tomatoes. Dean’s stomach lets out an angry growl, and Cas tells him he’s free to make his breakfast.

Cooking with Cas has become as precise as fighting with him. They can anticipate each other's needs and work around each other like a practiced dance. Before long, breakfast is served, and Cas begins carefully measuring out his spices.

Sam, Jack, and Dean eat at the table while Cas stands at the stove. “Hey Cas, why does your sauce taste so much better than Dean’s?” Sam yells across the kitchen.

“Oh, that’s because I only use fresh ingredients procured from local -- Uh, I mean because it’s made with love.” Cas turns, giving Sam an apologetic smile.  

“I knew we should have rehearsed that. You’re too literal, Cas.”

“My apologies. But as I was saying, Jack helps me locate the best fresh ingredients, and we harvest them together. Some we grow ourselves, but our soil isn’t ideal for -- What? Why are you laughing?”

“You’re adorable, Cas.” Sam pates him on the shoulder as he places his dishes in the sink. Without thinking, Dean raises his coffee in an “I’ll drink to that” motion before quickly pulling his mug back down, slamming it on the table. All eyes turn to him, and he chokes a little on his last bite of eggs. “Spider,” he manages to spit out. He’s pretty sure that if the hypertension doesn’t kill him, he might actually die of embarrassment. Because apparently he’s not only turned into a sap, but he’s also now a big dweeb.

Breakfast is over, and Dean sends Sam and Jack away, telling them they have to wash the dishes for the big Christmas dinner the following night, leaving him alone in the kitchen with Cas.

When he’s done his magic and the sauce is simmering, Cas joins Dean at the sink, rinsing and drying what’s left of the breakfast mess. The make idle talk now and then, but mostly they just enjoy each other's company. They have stood like this, at this same sink ton of times, yet this time it’s completely different. Dean stands closer to Cas, making sure to brush up against him each time he hands over a plate, and Cas lets his fingers linger a little longer when he takes the freshly washed dish.

As with the days before, they spend their time relaxing and enjoying their time together. Everyone is still slightly on edge waiting for someone to call with an emergency, but they do the best they can to pretend they are an ordinary family. It started snowing early in the morning and hadn’t stopped since. There is about six inches on the ground, with no signs of stopping. He’s not even sure whose idea it was, but just before evening, they find themselves outside playing in the snow. It’s dense and packs into a perfect ball, so naturally, Dean lobs it at Sam’s head. After that, chaos ensues, snow flying everywhere. Somehow Dean ends up on his back with Cas sitting on his shins, scooping hand fulls of snow onto his face. He’s wiggling trying to escape when Cas slips and lands face first in his chest. They both laugh, breathing hard. Cas pulls back slightly, still grinning and meets Dean’s gaze. They both stop breathing, and Dean wants to jump out of his skin. This is the most cliched moment he’s ever experienced, and gawd help him, he loves every second of it. With each intimate moment he’s finding it harder and hard to hold out on that stupid Christmas kiss.

“Sam, why do they look like they are about to eat each other?” Jack asks.

“Because they are."

Jack turns a curious eye at Sam. “What does that mean?”

“Nothing, kid. Come on, help me out,” Sam says, holding up a snowball. They both throw their snowball, hitting Cas on the side of the face and Dean’s shoulder.

“Son of a bitch!” Dean shouts. “That’s it, asshole, you’re going to get it.” He gets up, knocking Cas over in the process and chases down his little brother. Before long, Dean tackles Sam and stuffs snow down the back of his shirt.

“Truce, truce. Come on, Dean, I’m freezing. Let me up.” Sam struggles against Dean’s weight. 

Dean is laughing so hard he’s wheezing when he jumps up and offers Sam a hand. “Truce.”

They head back in just as the sun is setting. Sam rushed off to his room, instructing everyone to stay put. He returns with four brightly-colored packages. “I was going to save these until later, but now is the perfect time. Here, open.”

“Why did you wrap your own?” Dean asks.

“Shut up and just open it.”

Shreds of paper hit the floor as they each unwrap their Christmas gifts. They all hold up pajama sets - different color variations of plaid pj pants and henley shirts. “I figured since we all have to change, might as well change into warm PJs.” Sam blushes.

There is a chorus of thank yous before Dean claims dibs on the first shower.

“No way, dude, you shoved snow down my shirt. I think I even got some in my underwear. I’m going first,” Sam protests.

“What makes you think I didn’t get snow in my underwear?” 

“Because I didn’t see Cas put his hand down your pants, so I just assumed--”

“Screw you. I’m taking a shower.”

Cas, being the only adult in the room at that moment, interrupts asking why they don’t both take a shower in the locker room.

“Because I don’t want to hear what Dean has to do in the shower after that display outside.”

“Oh fuck you, Sam.”

“Enough. Both of you go shower. NOW. Dinner will be ready when you are done.”

“Fine, but you better keep it PG, Dean,” Sam stalks off.

Dean gives Cas what can only be defined as an awkward pleading look. “He’s kidding.” He scurries off before the other man can respond.

Years of sharing the same hotel room and walking around half naked made the showering in the same place less awkward than Dean expected. Sam was all the way in the corner, and Dean was in the first stall. He couldn’t pass up the opportunity to fuck with Sam and let out a long dramatic moan.

“You better be fucking joking right now, Dean. I swear to --”

Dean cuts Sam off with a burst of laughter. He tried to keep his laughter in, but he’d held out as long as he could.

“You’re such a jerk.” Sam’s water cuts off abruptly. “Take your time.”

Dean thinks Sam might have the right idea to ease some of the tension, but doesn’t want the pasta to get cold, so he finishes rinsing off and quickly dries and dresses in his new PJs. They are warm and cozy, and he’s glad that Sam thought of getting them. Pajamas are something they didn’t start using until they had lived in the bunker for more than a year. He wore lounge pants the year he was with Lisa but was never comfortable in them.

He could smell the sauce all through the bunker as he made his way to his bedroom. He dropped off his wet clothes, applied a layer of deodorant, and the face moisturizer he keeps hidden in his sock drawer. Just because he’s a hunter doesn’t mean he wants dry skin.

Dean joins the rest of his family as they gather around the counter preparing their plates. Cas also made meatballs and three cheese garlic bread. They sit at the table, and Sam opens a bottle of wine. They chat as the finish their mean and before long plates are empty and bellies are full. Everyone works together to clean up the kitchen, then head back to the family room.

The group spends the next several hours watching more Christmas movies, trying to get Cas and Jack caught up on all the classics. It’s not even midnight when Dean declares he’s going to bed. “We’ve gotta get up early tomorrow; I’m turning in.”

“Yup, me too. I’ve still got presents to wrap,” Sam adds, standing from his designated spot on the couch.

“I think I would like to sleep too. I want to experience the excitement of Christmas morning,” Jack chimes in.

Dean casts an eye towards Cas, “You going to be okay alone? I can--”

“I’ll be fine Dean, thank you. I, too, have presents to wrap.”

Everyone bids each other goodnight and they leave in different directions.

Dean has already wrapped all his gifts and pulls them out of his bottom drawer. Cas’ gift is a small package wrapped in shiny bold red and white diagonal-striped paper, with thin green stripes mixed in. It’s not the best wrapping job, but the green bow on top helps with the overall appearance. He sets Sam and Jack’s gifts on his desk and sits on his bed, Cas’ still in hand. He rubs his hand over the smooth surface. This little package is going to change his life forever. For better or worse, nothing will be the same. He thinks it’s going to be for the better.

Dean isn’t sure how long he stares at the package before he decides he needs some air. The room feels like it’s closing in on him, and he’s too anxious to sleep. He grabs his small pile of presents and makes his way to the Christmas tree. All the lights are off, and the tree is casting a warm glow over the room. He tucks all the gifts under the tree except one.

He’s starting to think the big public display was a horrible idea. He thought he would be proving something to Cas by declaring their relationship publicly, but now he just realizes he needed that as an excuse. He needed to prove something to himself. The thing is, he’s got nothing to prove. He cares so deeply for Cas, probably even loves him. So why did he think he needed to share their first intimate moment with everyone?

He’s about to take Cas’ gift back to his room when he catches the angel out of the corner of his eye. He’s got two mugs in his hand, and Dean’s favorite throw blanket draped over one of his arms.

“Mind if I join you?” Cas hands over a mug, marshmallows are floating on top, and it smells like cocoa.

Dean doesn’t say anything, just takes the cup with a grateful smile and gestures for Cas to sit next to him.

“Did you have a nightmare?” Cas asks.

“Nah, just have a lot on my mind.”

“Would it have anything to do with that package you're crushing?”

Dean lifts the corner of his mouth, staring down at the shiny box in his hand. “Actually, yeah. It does. This box it’s, ah, it’s kind of a big deal, you know. It’s probably going to change everything.”

“Oh, I don’t know. It’s just a box. It doesn’t have to change things. I mean, if you don’t want things to change that is.”

“Well I mean, I want what’s in the box. But to get what’s inside the box you have to tear away the wrapping. And I like the wrapping, the wrapping is good. It’s the best wrapping I’ve ever had. And I’m scared that what’s on the inside of the box isn’t better than the wrapping.” Dean trails off. _What a stupid metaphor_.

“What if you could have the wrapping _and_ the contents of the box?”

“What?”

“Well, maybe you could keep the present wrapped, and then buy the item that’s inside again. Or just rewrap the package.” 

Dean is watching Cas struggle, regretting even bringing up the stupid box in the first place. “You’re not making any sense, Cas.” 

“I know. You’re the one that came up with this dumb analogy anyway. All I’m saying is, you can have what’s in the box and have pretty wrapping too. It just might be a little different, is all. Probably better.”

He’s not surprised Cas has him figured out. It’s part of the reason he wants to be with him. No one will ever understand him the way Cas does. “Don’t you want to know what it is?”

“What’s in the box?” Cas parrots.

Dean chuckles, “Hey look at you, making references.” He bumps Cas' knee with his own.

Castiel catches Dean’s eye and with a soft smile, says, “I want what’s in the box more than I’ve ever wanted anything.”

He takes a big breath and hands Cas the present. It’s now or never, and he’s tired of waiting. The angel doesn’t open the gift right away, just holds it, never breaking eye contact with Dean. That same big grin Dean loves so much spreads across Cas’ face as he pulls the bow loose. He carefully removes the paper and sets it aside. Dean’s heart is about to pound out of his chest as he watches Cas remove the lid, his smile growing impossibly wider.

Cas reaches in and pulls out the sprig of mistletoe, holding it in front of his face. He inhales the scent and closes his eyes. Dean cups his elbow and pushes his arm up higher, making the mistletoe dangle above his head. He waits for Cas to open his eyes before leaning in. There is no way he could have misinterpreted their entire conversation, but he moves slowly, giving Cas the chance to back away if he wants to, but instead he leans forward to meet Dean halfway.

It’s a light brush of lips, and sparks are already flying through Dean’s body. He sighs deeply and presses closer to Cas, adding just a little more pressure. Cas is receptive to the changes and wraps his hand around Dean’s shoulder. It’s so symbolic, the mark may be gone, but Cas is reminding him of their bond, of their love.

Dean groans and deepens the kiss, plunging his fingers into Cas’ soft hair and pulling him closer. He licks at the Cas’ upper lip, coaxing his mouth open. Their tongues meet, tentatively at first, but soon they are rolling together in perfect synchronicity. Dean sucks Cas’ bottom lip into his mouth, lightly scraping his teeth across the tender flesh as he pulls back.

They are both gasping as Dean pulls away, and pushes their foreheads together. “I hope this is what you wanted for Christmas because I didn’t get you anything else.”

Cas laughs and dives back in to capture Dean’s mouth. They kiss again until Dean can’t breathe, and this time it’s Cas who pulls back first. “This is exactly what I wanted, Dean.”

“Merry Christmas, Cas.”

“Merry Christmas.” Cas kisses the tip of his nose.  

They spend the rest of the night trading slow, sweet kisses, expressing their affection with each press of lips. Dean eventually grows tired and rests his head on Cas' thigh, as the angel runs his fingertips across Dean's scalp.

Dean reaches for his gun as he's startled awake, only his hand doesn't reach under his pillow, it crashes into Cas' leg. The events of the previous night wash over him, and he smiles, burrowing deeper into the blanket.

Cas gently rubs his hand through Dean's hair and whispers, "Wake up, Dean, it's Christmas."

Dean shakes his head in protest. "No."

"Come on Dean, it's time for presents!" Jack shouts.

His eyes pop open, and he shoots straight up. He wanted his family to know, but not like this. He turns panicked eyes towards Sam, hoping to come up with an explanation in the point five seconds it takes to locate him sitting by the tree. The vice around his heart releases when he sees Sam's dopiest smile. The one that's reserved for puppies, adorable babies, and weddings. Sure they have only been to one wedding, but Sam had that same look on his face when they did.

He looks back to Cas and sees his puppy, baby, wedding smile, and mentally throws his hands in the air. He's done for and probably has a matching smile too. Jack just stands there with his usual wonderous smile, not having a clue what's going on. Dean says screw it and leans in to give Cas a quick kiss. There it's over, everyone knows, and he's survived.

"I thought you guys didn't like kissing in public," Jack accuses.

They laugh at his misconception. Dean will correct him later, but for now, he's focused on the more critical task: presents.

Sam starts handing out gifts one at a time. There are not a lot of presents, so they each take turns opening and thanking each other before moving on to the next. Jack loves the amulet and puts it on immediately. It makes his heart melt when the newest member of their family jumps up and throws himself at Dean. "I knew I could love you. I felt nothing but love from Castiel when I was still in my mother. He showed me how awesome you were; that's the term he used, awesome. And he was right, Dean, you are awesome. I love this, and I love you."

He clears his throat and blinks rapidly, clearing away the forming tears. "Ah, you too, kid. Iloveyoutoo." He blushes and ducks his head. He's not told his brother he loved him in probably fifteen years, and suddenly feels guilty. "You too, ya big moose."

"I love you too, Dean."

Dean takes Cas' hand; he's scared he can't say it. Scared Cas won't say it back. It's been less than twelve hours; is it okay to say it within the first day?

Cas, knowing Dean as well as he does, senses his panic, pulls him close, and murmurs, "I know." Dean crashes his lips up against Cas', nodding his head 'yes' as a single tear slips down his face. He pulls back and arms still wrapped around Cas' waist. He sees Sam picking up the abandoned wrapping paper, and Jack starting to read the new book series Cas got him. His family is happy, safe, and together. It's the Winchester version of a Christmas miracle.


End file.
